Art critics

My current calling is FHE Mom. Technically it's called home evening group leader but "Mom" is easier to remember. Anyway, for our big ward FHE for the semester we had a modern art show. Each group had to create a piece of artwork which was then displayed for all to see. Cheese, crackers, and cream puffs were served so obviously it was a high class event.Our piece most definitely had the most, "stop and stare" factor going for it because it was decided early on that grotesque and shocking were the two words that we wanted people to use to describe it. Mostly, I think we succeeded.

Mostly, I still don't know what to think.

Selective neglect

Four weeks from Saturday marks the start of finals week. My SIXTH finals week at BYU, seventh if you count that one Spring semester. I feel like there is more work left to do in the semester than has already been done. Oy vey. I'm in for a crazy four weeks. Let me introduce to you something my clinical instructor taught me about. It's called selective neglect. There are a few things I'm selectively neglecting and I know it is good for my soul.

Lemme tell you about some other things--

I had NG pass-offs today but read the schedule wrong and thought they were next week. WRONG. Lucky for me I've got an excellent friend that will have their husband bring me one of her scrub tops to wear. Also, it turns out that placing an NG tube in a mannequin is just about as easy as shoving a long straw down someone's nose. Passed with flying colors.

I been lifting weights to try and strengthen my weak Williams' arms. Mostly I've still got weak arms with really well defined deltoids. Now I kind of just want to bite the chunk of muscle right there.

This weekend is the Rex Lee Run, the weekend after that is the Festival of Colors, and the weekend after that is General Conference, and the weekend after that is nothing super exciting, and then the weekend after that is finals week. CRAZY!

We finally got a vacuum to replace the one that broke in October. I must say, nothing makes a house look cleaner than vacuum lines on the carpet.

My left pointer finger got smashed between the metal sink and about ten lunch trays at work. It's a pretty good battle wound.

Provo has given us a taste of Spring and I fear that it will be taken away soon. I almost want to pack up my winter coats but don't want to tempt the cold to return.

Sometimes I feel like the last week of my life has been make believe. Am I for really reals engaged to be married? Then I spy the shiny, shiny ring on my finger and remember about that cute boy that loves me. So many great things are happening.

The day I said yes to forever

Can I tell you a story? A story about how a certain boy made me the happiest girl in the world? If you answered yes to either of those questions then, by all means, continue reading.

Joshua got into Utah a little after 10pm on Friday night and we stayed at Alaina and Brad's snazzy new house. Neither of us slept very well that night mostly because the anticipation of two whole days in the same place is even greater than that of a child waiting for Christmas morning. At least, that's why I couldn't sleep. I found out later that Joshua had at least one huge reason to lay awake.

Needless to say, Saturday started super early and we were excited about it. We visited with Brad and Alaina for a bit and got ready for the day. Joshua was keen on hiking, for some reason, and Brad told us about the Stewart Falls trail. We made our way down to Provo and then up the canyon to find Stewart Falls. We drove around Sundance and could not find the trail head anywhere. The gas light was on in the car, there was snow everywhere, and I was getting sort of grumpy. We gave up on Stewart Falls and decided to make our way back out of the canyon to try find another, better marked, trail.

We found a trail that we had been on before that lead to a beaver dam and decided to try and find it. There was snow well, mostly snow that had been packed into ice, all over the trail. It was a slow climb but we where determined to find something beautiful. We gave up on finding the dam and sat on some logs by a stream. We talked for a while and then Joshua started saying nice things about me. I wish I could remember what he said because they were REALLY nice things. Anyway, after a few minutes of that he asked if he could show me what he'd made. Of course I said yes and he pulled a plastic box out of his backpack. Inside the box was a paper mache, anatomically correct (mostly), heart. He presented it to me and said, "Can I ask you a question?" "Yes" I replied. He opened the heart and said, "Will you marry me?"

Surprised doesn't even begin to cover how I felt in that moment. I knew for a fact that we were not going to get engaged this weekend and there was this boy in front of me asking me to marry him. I didn't have words. "Yes, yes, yes. Without a doubt yes!" was my reply after a few seconds to soak it all in.

He picked out this ring all by himself. We'd been ring shopping before but never found anything we couldn't live without. He told me later that he picked it out because he knew I was too indecisive to pick something for myself. This boy knows me so well.

I am elated! I've had that pit of my stomach, Christmas morning excited feeling ever since Saturday. This has been the best, most exciting weekend of my life. I cannot wait to start forever with my best friend. I look forward to a life will always be exciting, hilarious, and joyful.

I am the luckiest.

Happy Leap Day!

We tried really hard to get a self timer leaping shot of the three of us to celebrate this monumental day. Unfortunately we failed pretty hard at it. It was still a good time had by all.

Sick day

I took a sick day today. I looked at Pinterest and watched Boy Meets World all day. I don't really even feel bad about it. Somewhere between the hardest semester of school ever, this sickness, and my heart being 882 miles away, I'm having a hard time. I guess what I'm saying is that I could use some motivation and or laughs. Like Nacho baby here...

Or maybe the coolest cat ever...

Or basically anything Ron Swanson. Sound off in the comments!

Your help will be much appreciated.

Loads of Love,

Mallory Jan

Making faces and going places

I am a really lucky girl. Not only because I'm living the BYU dream in nursing school, have generally good health, and an awesome family, but because I've got a boy named Joshua Lutes to be my best friend. Seriously, so lucky. Imma tell you some nice things about this boy.

Sometimes he'll fix my computer if I ask real nice

His teen girl squad voice always makes me laugh

He is a public transportation professional

He'll fill the drink fridge with Diet Cokes just for me

We get to spend time together in Seattle

He is super crafty and makes cool things

He's really kind to me when I fall asleep on the couch

He can teach me things that I don't know

Basically there are just a lot of things to love about this boy.

Simply delightful

-They are in the process of putting new carpet in the HBLL and it smells delightful.

-I killed a mannequin in simulation lab yesterday. Alright, it wasn't all by myself, my three classmates maybe helped a little bit.

-I did get to practice my CPR skills

-Lab simulation companies make sprays that smell like a real GI bleed. Let me tell you right now, that smell is NOT delightful. If I have to deal with smells like that in real life I will probably vomit. (Oh gosh, I'm probably going to vomit at school/work eventually)

-I really love old people. Somewhere between the nursing home last semester and the veterans at the VA this semester I find myself wishing I could walk up and talk to the old guy sitting across from me in the airport. Their life experience is just really neat.

-I MIGHT be changing my view of being a nurse in a hospital. Life would always be exciting, that's for sure.

-This three day weekend is going to be just what I need to forget how much work school is.

-

Lessons from a girl in the deli

Customer Service:

-If you want to make a girls day, tell her that you like her jewelry

-Asking someone how their day is going gets pretty boring but you have to do it

-Oh, you wanted that sandwich that I just made and handed to you toasted? No problem! Just hand it back to me

Food:

-Wrapping a sammich is like wrapping the most difficult present of your life

-I don't know how long something's been sitting out unless I just made it

-Everything can be rewarmed!

-If it tastes delicious it is more than likely full of things that are bad for you.

Dishes:

-You're going to have to do the dishes, no matter how much you try to avoid it so you may as well get in there and be happy about it.

-If by chance water happens to find it's way through the v of your polo and roll down your belly, just go with it.

-ALWAYS wear the plastic apron

-Steel wool actually serves a purpose

In general:

-Your manager might think you're weird because he doesn't get your sense of humor and somehow how always misses what you say but that's okay, you'll still get paid anyway.

-Hot food never looks good after standing and being hot for four hours

-You will burn your hands on hot pans, not bad enough to leave a mark but just enough to sting for the whole shift

-The peanut butter and banana sammich is the cheapest, and most delicious thing on the menu. (honey roasted peanut butter will change your life)

-Work is hard but mostly worth it come payday.

Seattle fun times

Oh hey, did you know that I went to Seattle? It's true! Last weekend I got to visit Joshua for his birthday and the big Amazon end of the holiday season party. I forget how much I love the rainy Northwest. It was cloudy and sort of rainy the whole weekend and I could not have been happier. Here's what we did in bullet points
- Ate hamburgers
- Opened birthday presents
- I sang Happy Birthday to Joshua and he blew out one candle that was in an oreo cakester
- Watched Project Runway!
- Wandered Pike's Place Market
- Ate Lunch served by the family of emo carnies
- Just Danced (no one can beat Joshua)
- Amazon party where we had our caricature drawn (SPOILER ALERT: we're totally riding a dinosaur)
- Attended 9am church
- Watched Malcolm in the Middle
- Fed the Missionaries lasagna, garlic bread, and broccoli
- Finished Pharmacology homework
- Watched a British movie that put me to sleep
- Rode two forms of public transportation
- And had my picture taken with a pig since it's not a real vacation until I have a picture with an animal statue.

Because sometimes I like to remember how good I have it

+My french braids looked really good yesterday

+I live with two of my best friends

+JFLutes always knows how to help me feel better

+Only one full day until Seattle!

+I got to cashier at work yesterday

+I can jog three miles and not want to die

+I have the ability to express myself with words.

+I'm listening to the new Ingrid Michaelson CD and starting to like it

+There is a small possibility I'll get a nap today

+Thursday is temple day!

Maybe imma be busier than I thought

You know how I get to do cool things like start IVs on my classmates? Well let me just tell you, that cool reward does not come with a hefty price. I've been sitting in my kitchen for the last seven hours working on a giant post assessment for clinical. Okay, I did take a short break somewhere in the middle to make pumpkin muffins so maybe I've only been working for six hours.

On the bright side:

+ I'm using the textbooks that they make me buy for school. So far I've cited six of my textbooks on this assignment alone. Who knew that textbooks were helpful?
+This is the first of many post assessment that I'll be doing this semester so hopefully I'll get faster. (Please bless I get faster!)

+I'm still learning a lot of really cool things and while this assignment is tedious, I don't totally hate it.

But seriously

Check out my handiwork. I'm basically a real nurse now.

Two weeks of heaven

I'm having a hard time finding the words to write about the Christmas Cruise so I'm mostly going to rely on pictures. and maybe a few words. Basically, I want to live on a warm beach. I want to make a million dollars and then retire and live on a beach in Mexico. Swimming in the ocean, I mean, come on. Favorite parts include:

-Double desserts

-Early dinner with the old people

-Second dinner

-Hanging out in our tiny room

-Not even Belizing that we were in different countries

-Exercising around the deck

-Sven

-The GI bug!

-Napping in the sun

-Swimming in the Ocean

-Supermart in Mexico

-Christmas spectacular

The list goes on and on but I'm not going to rub it in any longer. It was such a great week!

And if a Christmas cruise weren't enough, I got to spend the next eight days in California with Joshua Lutes and family. I've got one picture from the whole trip. Me and Joshua at the baptism of Jeremy and Alec. There were pictures of us with the moustache cookies that we made but I forgot to get them off of the computer in California. Sad day. But this is a pretty cute picture if I do say so myself.

Best parts of the California trip include:

-Going to Costco every other day

-Reading Dinosaur Comics

-Wearing shorts and sitting in the sun

-Remembering that charades is awful and fun at the same time. We shall forevermore call it awfully-fun, I guess.

-Sherlock Holmes

-Trampoline!

-My bed that took up all of the floor space in Ashleigh's room

-Donuts

-Miniature golf at Castle Park (meh)

-Andrew's sad face

-Just Dance with eight people watching

In the end, break was a blast. Life is a blast and there is so much to love about it. I am so lucky to have so many great people in my life. I say it every year but I'll say it again, BEST CHRISTMAS EVER!

Oh, boy.

Because sometimes you just wish you could throw a rock at a cactus

And go Black Friday shopping with your sisters

Today was one of those days.

Christmas come faster!

Reasons to not be stressed

We literally spent two weeks in pathophysiology talking about how terrible stress of any kind is for your body. I could tell you about cortisol, decreased immune response, decreased healing rates, and the negative effects it has on almost every body system but that just makes me even more stressed. So instead of remembering how stressed I really am at this moment I am going to make a list of reasons to not be stressed.

1. Christmas music. Particularly this song.

2. Only four more days of school classes.

3. This semester will eventually end, really soon.

4. Naps seem to be solving everything for me right now

5. Warm beaches are in my near future

6. I've got everything I need to make s'mores bars when life seems impossible

7. Alyssa and I have a lot of little fun things planned for finals week.

8. Amanda did not murder me in my sleep for calling her "Mandy"

9. Jan (or should I say Santa?) agreed to bring stockings on the Christmas cruise.

10. I've got enough Diet Coke to get me through finals week

11. Another weekend in Washington Terrace with the Robertsons and Joshua

12. I have a book to finish on Kendall's Kindle

13. Dinosaur sheets

14. It only snowed a baby bit last night which did not make my walk to school impossible

15. Temple lights on Saturday!

16. I can do hard things.

Inconsequential

-I walk past this tree every day and get sort of creeped out. Can you tell why?

-While the original picture was great, the one with moustaches is even better. Nursing students be crazy.

-The BYU Tree of Life sculpture is no more. It was demolished about a month ago.

-Tonight I sang along to Mariah Carey's "All I want for Christmas is You" to Joshua via video chat, he was not impressed.

-I had to park on the street because my roommate's dumb boyfriend took the last spot in our parking lot.

-Only two more times that I have to go to pathophysiology

In the spirit of Thanksgiving...

In no particular order, here are twenty things that I am so thankful for this year...

-Hot Tamales

-Three sisters that are all so unique and lovely

-The BYU Nursing program

-Friends in my nursing classes that help me love school

-The Provo Temple

-Airplanes that let me get to see the people I love

-Video chats which also help me see the people that I love

-Joshua Lutes

-Regina Spektor and her ridiculously intricate song lyrics

-My physical body and all of the tiny processes that make it work

-Harry Potter

-Laughter

-Really great roommates who are also my best friends

-The Lord's timing

-The opportunity that it gives me to learn patience

-A Saab named Vince

-Adrienne Sage, Henry Rex, and B. Elliot

-Sore muscles and Zumba

-Family time

-The ability to learn

-The joy that comes from doing what I know to be right

Are we there yet?

TWO DAYS!

until my D&C final project is due

until I get to play with Henry Rex (and Kendall)

until I am finished with pathophysiology test 4 of 5

until I get to forget about school for the weekend

until my best friend comes into town!

until this photo gets to be recreated

because it is my favorite.

In two days I will be the happiest girl in the world.

I moustache you a question

Don't ask me why, because I don't have a reason. Please don't ask me when, because I couldn't tell you. And for really reals, don't ask me how, that's just how it is. Yes world, the rumors are true, I am one of those weird people that loves the moustache. People can think it's weird, and I'm okay with it. I like to think that it makes me interesting. Mostly I just try to aim for the unexpected.

Anyway, Amanda wanted to have an 11/11/11 party and I wanted to have a moustache party so we combined the two. Also, I was thinking that if I couldn't get married on 11/11/11 I might as well do something awesome, like celebrate moustaches. I'll hit you with some highlights in the list below because I find it impossible to explain my life in paragraph form and still make it interesting.

+I cut out at least 10 different moustaches and glued them to sticks. People just held them up to their faces and visited with each other.

+I tried to have my picture taken with each one throughout the night.

+The moustache on the wall is at least 5 feet long and surrounded by famous people that have moustaches. Very classy.

+Cookies, chips, and soda were the refreshments

+Mt Dew spilled on the kitchen linoleum. The floor is still sticky after being wiped down 2 times.

+Party guests included nursing friends, work friends, old friends, London friends, ward members, and roommates.

+One party goer attended via picture text. (my favorite)

+Strangers showed up to our party which means it was, obviously, a real college party.

+It has been decided that we'll have a weirdly themed party once a month. Keep your eyes open for the Kevin Bacon and Mug party.

+The post party roommate chat was a really great extension to a really great night.

But here is the really big question that I have for you. Are you ready? Someday when your children ask what you did on 11/11/11, will you be able to tell them something awesome? I sure know that I will be telling them all about my 'stache party, and they will think I'm awesome.

Halloween Times

Henry didn't quite know what to think about his favorite Aunt having a moustache.

We're just a hipster and a dude, trying against all odds to be friends. Somehow we make it work.

Sometimes I make us take sad pictures. because I think they are hilarious.

But we're actually pretty happy. Actually, we're really happy most of the time. Especially when we've got delicious food in our bellies. Hooray for Halloween celebrations!